About Him

I think that he might actually like me. He might think that I'm attractive.

I used to like this one boy that I'll refer to as SS.
SS, oh geez, I've made so many hints to him that I like him. But he clearly likes another girl who is extremely thin and beautiful, and also a lesbian (sucks for him :P).
But that got me thinking, what if I became like her?
She looks like she's maybe 90 pounds or so and she's like 5 foot 8 maybe?
She's so freaking beautiful and rocks a short haircut.
Maybe if I become like her, SS might find me attractive.

Now G is a guy that I really really really really like. He "proposed" to me when we were little kids.
I don't really know if I've made any hints to him that I like him. I mean, I've told him that I think he's beautiful...multiple times. (Do men get offended by this?)
He's sooo gorgeous though. He doesn't even realize how lucky he is. I almost want to BE him, lmfao.
He and I have only one class together and I sit by him and we talk about everything - from scientifical things to everyday things to stupid things, and sometimes just sit together in silence. But it doesn't matter to me, as long as I'm with him. I think I like N more to be honest, than SS.
Actually I think I feel more than just a "like" for N. Call me crazy since I'm only 14 (ALMOST 15 :D) but I keep a photo of us as little kids by my bedside table. I like him so much. He probably thinks that I'm super-annoying but oh well. What am I supposed to do. I AM annoying.

I don't have N's number but we chat often on Facebook. A lot of the time though, he ignores me. And he talks to this other girl a lot, not that I blame him. She's prettier. She has bigger eyes and a prettier face. I would choose her too. Sometimes it sucks being Asian because you have little eyes and short legs.

Clearly, I'll never be pretty enough for N. But maybe I can be skinny enough to grasp his attention. I don't think he'll ever care about me until I am. Since I'm a freshmen, at the end of the year is our first formal dance and I'd love to look skinny for the photos and maybe be asked by N. Not that it'll ever happen. Geez, I like him so much.

This is Sooyoung from SNSD. Aren't her legs perfect. OMFG. Some Asians are lucky enough to have skinny long legs. Mine will never be long but maybe they'll get skinny.

 

Wish me luck, if anyone actually reads this blog. :)